• author
    • Terri Connett

      Columnist
    • December 5, 2017 in Columnists

    She Said, He Dead

    It could be my obsession with “Game of Thrones,” but every time I hear a man accused of sexual impropriety, I sadly see him taking the Cersei Walk of Atonement. Charlie Rose, Kevin Spacey, Al Franken, Dustin Hoffman, Matt Lauer; all of them walking naked in the public square while we townspeople righteously and repeatedly shout “SHAME” and throw poop at them.

    Then again, there are those deserving of the shit storm:

    • Harvey Weinstein because of the sheer numbers and that damning audio tape.
    • Roy Moore because they were children for God sake! He was banned from the frigging mall. And Moore proudly reminisced about singling out his future wife at a dance recital when she was 15 and he was 30.
    • Bill O’Reilly. Just because.

    But for the countless other men, I question why their professional lives are over. Is it possible to believe the women who’ve come forward and also feel compassion for all the lives affected? Even those of the alleged perpetrators?

    Yes, rubbing your boner against a woman at the office is never a good idea. But I keep thinking about the photo of Mark Halperin and his new baby on “Morning Joe” a few months back. How is he going to make a living? And how am I going to live without “The Circus” on Showtime? I loved that show!

    And Kevin Spacey acted deplorably. In one case, against a boy the same age of the young girls Roy Moore used to stalk at the Orange Julius. But Spacey’s weird apology seemed to land on his “shocking” coming out story. Kev’s gay? What’s next? That’s a hairpiece?

    Season five of Netflix’s “House of Cards” ended with (spoiler alert) Claire Underwood stepping up to become the first female President of the United States as her husband, Frank Underwood (Kev), stepped down.

    In the final scene she did what only Frank had done throughout the series. She looked into the camera, addressing the viewers directly, and she said, “My turn.”

    But hell no, it’s not her turn. Thanks to Kevin Spacey’s sexual deviancies, we can’t even have a FICTIONAL female president! “House of Cards” has fallen like a … come on! I loved that show!

    And the “life irritating art” only gets weirder when you think about Dustin Hoffman’s Oscar-nominated performance in “Tootsie.” Hoffman’s character dressed like a woman to get work on a soap opera and literally walked in the shoes of actresses having to deal with misogyny in show business. Yet in real life, Hoffman has been accused by two women, so far, of sexual harassment.

    Then there’s Golden Globe and Emmy-winning actor Jeffrey Tambour who plays Maura Pfefferman, a transgender woman in the amazing Amazon series “Transparent.” Tambour plays a woman born in a boy’s body who takes us through a painful, and hilarious, transitioning journey. Tambour hasn’t accepted the blame of his accusers, but has stepped away from “Transparent.” It’s hard to imagine the show without him/her. Another great series bites the dust.

    What happens to the cast and crew of shows abruptly canceled? And how does this work in the real world? What if a gifted heart surgeon is found guilty of groping the nurses? Does he lose his job? What happens to the next person in line for a heart transplant? How does this all play out?

    I don’t know a single woman who hasn’t had a #MeToo moment. I’m happy the men finally believe the women. But I’ve got to say I’m a little leery of the speedy and total annihilation of the accused in the media and entertainment worlds.  What’s wrong with me that I’m not enjoying the swift justice women are finally getting after decades of disbelief? Why do I worry about what happens to these allegedly abusive men?

    Just so you know I haven’t gone completely soft, the probable coronation of Alabama’s child molester and the Predator-in-Chief getting away with it, and getting elected in spite of it, makes me completely bat shit. But that’s a story for another day.

    Minutes before I felt I should turn in my uterus (never used, good condition) I came across a self-affirming Opinion piece in the New York Times by Bari Weissnov entitled “The Limits of ‘Believe All Women.'”

    My conflicted feelings found a voice.

    Weissnov wrote, “I believe that the ‘believe all women’ vision of feminism unintentionally fetishizes women. Women are no longer human and flawed. They are Truth personified. They are above reproach.

    I believe that it’s condescending to think that women and their claims can’t stand up to interrogation and can’t handle skepticism. I believe that facts serve feminists far better than faith. That due process is better than mob rule.”

    Of course I will survive without “House of Cards” and “Transparent.” And “The Today Show” will go on minus Matt Lauer.

    But I don’t want to live in a world where it’s revealed the actor who played Hodor had a secret button installed under his cave to hold the door on unsuspecting young interns. And therefore we are robbed of the final six episodes of “Game of Thrones.”



    • Terri, I predict that children will study these days in history class as one of the giant steps forward in the struggle for women’s rights. It is history in the making every time someone comes forward.


        • Terri Connett

        • December 6, 2017 at 6:19 am
        • Reply

        It sure does feel like that, Don! Thanks for reading. 🙂



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