Wow, everybody has their panties in a bunch because Vice President Joe Biden had to spend $585,000.50 for hotel rooms at the Hotel Intercontinental Paris Le Grand. Geeze, give the guy a break will ya! The vice president and his wife traveled to Paris with a rather large entourage, so they had to have every room in the building — 132 rooms to be precise.

What, did you expect them to stay at Motel 6? Well even if he did, Motel 6 is not $6 dollars a night anymore. I don’t think it ever was. Anyway, back to the current problem. I don’t think $585,000 is all that much, after all, the government does control billions and billions of dollars doesn’t it?

Oh, I’m sure there are some of you who think over half a million dollars is too much to be spent on a hotel room, even by a vice president. Whatever! I know better and I’ll spell it out for you, and at the same time I’ll account for every penny they spent. You are probably thinking “How is he going to do this?” OK, spread out, I’ll show you. I’ll do it with ciphers and ciphering.
Follow me now!

• Total hotel bill = $585,000.50

• Number of rooms rented = 132 +/-
Ok that comes to $5,850 per room, per night. Mr. Biden was given a dollar discount for each room because they actually did spend the whole night.

• OK, we have a new total of $584,865.

• The new adjusted rate for per room, per night is $4,429.77 (much better)
Now we have a place to start. I will use a SSA (Sanders Series Approximation) 1/Sqrt (1+v^2/c^2) ~ 1 + 1/2 * v^2/c^2 if v/c << 1.

Note that if v is small compared to c, then (just as in Einstein’s Theory of Relativity, E – m*c^2) what we have is 1/2 * m * v^2. Simple so far, right?

Where “r” is the “room”, c is the speed of light, and v is the velocity of time it took Mr. Biden to spend the half a million dollars then the full equation is r=c * gamma * c^2. Now we’re getting to the root of the matter quickly. Pay attention!

Vice President Biden’s spending energy is equal to the old familiar kinetic energy… but only in the approximation that v/c << 1. Do you follow me still? When v = 0, it is just E = m * c^2, which is called the rest mass energy because the object is at rest (v = 0). Where do you rest? Simple, you rest in a hotel room, hundreds of them. But I won’t go into that.

A statement made by the Vice President insinuated that he used an additive identity to pay his share of the hotel bill. Since no one in my town, the City of Winters California, except Woody Fridae will know what an additive identity is, here is the definition: Additive identity = a number that can be added to other numbers without changing its value.

I don’t know about you, but I’m extremely happy with the situation. I’m happy he didn’t spend two nights.