• Veterans must learn to live for love

    by Donald K. Sanders

    There is a willingness of governments to mislead and deny important information to the public. I think everyone should sit up and take notice and realize that they CANNOT trust those in government to provide accurate information, or to do the right thing for anyone but themselves. The rich and powerful meet behind closed doors in secret organizations like The Council on Foreign Relations and a few others.

    Founded in 1921, the Council on Foreign Relations is the most powerful private organization in the world. Its 5000 or so members reflect the resources needed by the ruling class to maintain its power. You will not become a member of this organization unless you have big money, national security expertise, CIA experience, a political constituency, or clout with the media.

    The major activity of the Council on Foreign Relations is to organize closed door meetings for its members with assorted world leaders where everyone feels free to share their views and information about current world affairs. The organization has strict confidentially rules and keeps its records locked up for 25 years. Its membership roster is somewhat of a secret but some of the known members were Presidents Nixon, Ford, Carter, Bush Sr., Clinton, and Bush Jr.

    Some of the world’s largest and richest corporations are tied to this secretive organization. The Council on Foreign Relation voices its opinions through some of the most powerful of media outlets. It is unknown what the council’s agenda is but I suspect it has something to do with money because its members are among the richest people in the world.

    Wars begin when a greater government forces its will on a smaller, weaker one. Wars do not start by accident, nor will they ever. Governments have no sadness. It knows only the word of law without justice; without forgiveness. In theory its laws are for the people but in practice they are only for the rich. The major religious organizations tell us of Heaven and Hell, while they work hand in hand with whatever government happens to be in power at any given time. With the Vatican cooperation with Nazi Germany, this is proven to be true.

    Holy men tell us of the afterlife and the forgiveness of sin. Personally, I find that the idea of an afterlife makes our actual life less sacred. The fear, wonder, and speculation of the “after” can dim the “during.” Religion and the mass media can make us feel “alright” with going to war. Eventually we wish to go to war. Before we choose our wishes we’d better think first, because with every wish there comes a curse.

    Once in the military, we are called to kill; the word of law says it is so. It gives us the illness with no cure, no help, and no relief. When the war ends the government asks for no forgiveness. Its heart is never full of sorrow. It doesn’t think about tomorrow and it doesn’t care about the past. It knows no time while, for we humans, now the veterans, the days turn into years and the years turn into a lifetime. We want to walk away from our past but when we step into our own footprints, we find that we cannot step away from ourselves. We go in circles that spiral ever downward; ever downward.

    There is one thing that all veterans have in common. We have to look at ourselves in the mirror. We see the sadness in our own eyes. We find it hard to give or receive love because we think you see us the way that we see ourselves. In our minds, we are a burden to those who care for us.

    We can’t see our greatest hopes because of our darkest fears. With heaven above and hell below, we are suspended in a space somewhere in between. We are nearer the latter than the former. Wherever we sleep, the shadows fall around us, sucking any respite from our bones. We can see the hands of the angels but they do not reach for us.

    We begin to think that punishment will save us and give us some relief but we can find none of that for, like our government, we know no justice. Desperate, we punish ourselves in increments, ever increasing in severity. All of our colors bleed to red when the final self-punishment is ours. Every 80 minutes, a veteran will kill himself. For thousands of years, from the Pharaohs to the Kings and on to the Tsars and Presidents, it has always been the same.

    Why can’t we veterans see what millions of eyes can see. We learn to love life, not because we are used to living but because we are used to loving. We must show our veterans that time and love can heal all wounds, for love seems the swiftest, but it is actually the slowest of all growths. There has to be some way or some thing that will make veterans wait for love; live for love.

    C’est La Vie



    • Another truly heartfelt story, Donald. I know you found love and will continue on your journey to forgive yourself for whatever you were told to do in war. I can see through your writings that it is a slow painful process but I also hear you laugh, smile, love and find joy in your life. You have truly brought introspection and joy to mine.



    • You can be the first, Donald… live for love. You are well loved!


      • Denise O'Connor

      • January 29, 2012 at 10:32 pm
      • Reply

      And it’s all an inside job, isn’t it? All of it. Forgiveness, Love. None of it coming from outside of me has staying power. Not from religion, not even from my loves, my husband and my son, though they come close. Still, what they have to give I can’t receive unless I make space, inside, where the size of that holding space is directly related to the love and forgiveness I must muster for myself. Meditation is the only thing I know that takes me there. And the irony is that when I do love myself enough to go there I no longer need the holding, just the space for the ebb and flow. You have a real gift for the vets, Don… just as you are in all your honesty.



    • I agree with Denise.Forgiveness comes from self love. Meditation, exerecise,giving back to others, and taking care of yourself is the best gift one can give one’s self.
      We can’t change the past, but learning to forgive what’s happened in the past, allows us to give way beyond what we ever imagined for the future.
      You’re special Don. I’m so glad that you are able to share your past. It allows others to see things they may not otherwise never be exposed to, and hopefully understand just how difficult it is to forgive and not judge.


      • Judy N

      • January 30, 2012 at 4:51 pm
      • Reply

      You are on the path, Donald, that’s clear.



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